Ep 59: Thankful for Asexuality
SARAH: Hey what’s up hello. Welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aro-ace girl (I’m Sarah. That’s me.)
KAYLA: And a demi straight girl (that’s me, Kayla.)
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else that we just don’t understand.
KAYLA: On today’s episode: Being thankful.
BOTH: — Sounds fake, but okay.
*Intro music*
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod.
KAYLA: What a magical opening.
SARAH: Okay, listen.
KAYLA: Here’s the tea.
SARAH: If my brain/body just shuts down at any time in the near future, I would not be surprised, nor would I blame it.
KAYLA: If Sarah just falls right over onto her computer right now, I just wouldn't be surprised at all.
SARAH: Yeah, no. Me either.
KAYLA: But anyway –
SARAH: Here we are.
KAYLA: It is, when you're listening to this, like four days until Thanksgiving, if you live in America.
SARAH: It's still four days to Thanksgiving for American Thanksgiving regardless of –
KAYLA: Well, I suppose no matter where you live it will be four days from American Thanksgiving.
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: You just might not care.
SARAH: Also you might be listening to this on another day.
KAYLA: But anyway, we're recording it a week from Thanksgiving.
SARAH: That's true.
KAYLA: Anyway, these are the facts and we're going to –
SARAH: These are the facts.
KAYLA: And we're going to –
SARAH: Yeah, we wanted to do, and by we I mean I, wanted to do a sort of Thanksgiving-themed thing but I didn't know what to do and I had a very stressful week so I was like Kayla, come up with some ideas.
KAYLA: And this is my winning idea. It's not even that bad.
SARAH: It's not that bad. I mean I don't know what I would have come up with that would have been different.
KAYLA: Probably the same thing. So we're just going to go through some things we're thankful for, like Jimmy Fallon on Friday's Thank You Note-style.
SARAH: For a second, I thought you meant the first thing you were thankful for was Jimmy Fallon, and I was like you really can pick something better.
KAYLA: I really could.
BOTH: (laugh)
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So we're going to talk about what we're thankful for, and at the end we'll get serious.
SARAH: Why would you give spoilers?
KAYLA: Sorry. Spoiler alert.
SARAH: No, you just shouldn't have told them. It's a surprise.
KAYLA: Okay, well just forget that. Anyway Sarah, what are you thankful for?
SARAH: Why did you make me go first?
KAYLA: It's just for fun.
SARAH: I'm thankful for cheese.
KAYLA: Why?
SARAH: It's tasty.
KAYLA: You don't have good reasons for these? I have answers for –
SARAH: I had a dumpster fire week. What do you want me to do?
KAYLA: All right, fine. My first thing that I'm thankful for is felt tip pens, and I'll tell you why. I recently acquired a 24 pack of colorful felt tip pens. And since I have used them to take (laughs) – I am so lame. Since I have started using them to take notes in class, my hand doesn't cramp. Because here's the tea about ballpoint pens is they run out. Especially the shitty free kind.
SARAH: See, I don't use ballpoint, I always use gel pens. The specific type, like the Pilot G2 pens.
KAYLA: Oh, not sponsored.
SARAH: Not sponsored.
KAYLA: But the shitty ballpoint ones. And eventually after like two seconds, they stop being good so you have to really press hard to make them work, and so my hand would always hurt so bad.
SARAH: Too aggressive.
KAYLA: But felt tip pens
SARAH: Gentle.
KAYLA: They just go. So gentle. And my hand –
SARAH: You just caress the page.
KAYLA: You really do caress the page. And my hand doesn't hurt anymore, and every day of notes is a different color because I have 24 colors to pick from.
SARAH: Wow. Did you know that there are more than 24 days in a month?
KAYLA: That has nothing to do –
SARAH: If you took notes every day in the month including the weekends, which I know you definitely have class then – Listen, I started to say it, and then realized it didn't make sense.
KAYLA: It doesn't matter. Because a lot of times I'll use the same colors anyway. It's not like I'm – I'm not using like the yellow to take notes, because then you can't read it. Anyway, what else are you thankful for?
SARAH: I'm thankful for – This one’s a little bit passive aggressive. I'm thankful for sleep.
KAYLA: Are you being passive aggressive at yourself right now?
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: All right.
SARAH: So me and sleep, we have kind of like a long-distance relationship. Like we don't see each other that much.
KAYLA: Interesting.
SARAH: But when we do, it's really great. We're never together long enough, as long as I would like.
KAYLA: That's so hard.
SARAH: But I do have a real passion for sleep. It's just it's kind of hard.
KAYLA: That's hot.
SARAH: Yeah. It's just kind of hard sometimes.
KAYLA: It sounds like one of those relationships that it's just like, the passion is so strong, but you know you aren't compatible, but because it's just so thrilling you just keep going.
SARAH: Oh yes, when I sleep it's very thrilling. I never remember my dreams, so that's not entirely true.
KAYLA: How do you feel when sleep leaves you?
SARAH: So sad.
KAYLA: That's really tough.
SARAH: I know.
KAYLA: I'm really sorry.
SARAH: Thank you. Kayla, what are you thankful for?
KAYLA: The second thing I'm thankful for is eyebrows. And this is for multiple reasons.
SARAH: What about really ugly eyebrows that look like tadpoles?
KAYLA: Well, I'm just talking about eyebrows in general.
SARAH: To keep things out of your eyes? That's what they're for.
KAYLA: Yes. The reason I'm thankful – I have two reasons for being thankful for eyebrows.
SARAH: One is the right eyebrow and one is the left eyebrow. I made a good joke just now and Kayla got distracted by a text, because she looks at her phone during podcast episodes.
KAYLA: I'm glad I did, that was stunning content. Here's the reasons that I'm good – That I’m good for my eyebrows.
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: I'm thankful for eyebrows. It's because one, people look terrible without them.
SARAH: Oh, it's horrifying.
KAYLA: Have you seen the picture where they take off the eyebrows of people?
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Bad news. Second, how expressive? My teacher today was trying to draw a face on the board and she was like, that face is supposed to be angry. But you couldn't tell, and then she added eyebrows and we were like, that's an angry person.
SARAH: It's like – What's his name?
KAYLA: I don't know.
SARAH: He plays Barry on the TV show Barry. He was on SNL.
KAYLA: What's the show Barry?
SARAH: He's New York's hottest new club.
KAYLA: Oh Stephan.
SARAH: Yeah. What's his name?
KAYLA: Bill Hader.
SARAH: Bill Hader. Bill Hader has very expressive eyebrows.
KAYLA: I love Bill Hader so much.
SARAH: Barry is a good show. I've only seen the pilot.
KAYLA: I've never even heard of it.
SARAH: It was good. I saw a lot of posters for it when I was in LA.
KAYLA: (scoffs)
SARAH: This just in, I can't talk about anything that happened to me over the summer, because Kayla will get dumb about it.
KAYLA: That's true. What else are you thankful for Sarah?
SARAH: I'm thankful for – This is a couple of things combined. Dogs, cats, furry things in general. Not all furry things.
KAYLA: Furries?
SARAH: No. No, no, no. I should have been more specific. We're just going to say dogs and cats. Maybe like a rabbit.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Otters.
KAYLA: Mm-hmm.
SARAH: Specifically though, I love the WeRateDogs Twitter but Thoughts of Dog is run by the same guy and it's better than WeRateDogs in my opinion.
KAYLA: I think I would have to agree.
SARAH: Yeah. If you don't follow Thoughts of Dog, what are you doing? They are the thoughts of Matt – I’m thinking about the guy who runs the account, it’s the thoughts of his dog.
KAYLA: Yeah. And they're very good.
SARAH: It's just truly beautiful. The feet, they do a tip-a-tapping.
KAYLA: They do.
SARAH: They're tip-a-tapping. Lots of like just periods, and words.
KAYLA: I'm trying to think of my third thing was. I wrote it down on the side of my notebook in class
SARAH: I thought you were going to say the side of my nose.
KAYLA: No.
SARAH: You wouldn't be able to see it there.
KAYLA: I wouldn't. I wrote it down in class in my notebook, because I have priorities and they are content and –
SARAH: Interesting, because I don't think your prioritizing content right now, Kayla.
KAYLA: Sweetie. Oh, this wasn't it but I thought of it earlier today.
SARAH: That ain't it, sweetie. (laughs)
KAYLA: That ain't it chief. It's memes. Specifically I really like this meme. I've only seen it twice on Twitter, and I'm hoping it takes off. The caption was of – So the tweet text was Lansing, Michigan and it was a video of some very exotic beach. And then I saw one that was of Howell, which is the town next to where I'm from. It was talking about some shitty lake that's in Howell and they were like, "I need to go there before I die." And it was some like very clear ocean water. And I think that meme is so funny.
SARAH: I didn't realize that was a meme, I only saw the Lansing one. I didn't see any other one. It's a rising meme here in Michigan.
KAYLA: It's like an underground meme. I don't know if you would have heard of it, you know? I mean I guess I've only seen it twice so I don't know if you can classify it as a meme yet.
SARAH: It's a trend.
KAYLA: But I'm a big fan of it. I've only seen two, and I've loved both of them.
SARAH: That's beautiful.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: All right, I don't have anything else written, so we're winging it. This is a very professional podcast. Hello new listeners.
KAYLA: Yeah. I feel like a lot of you are probably new because –
SARAH: So I'm sorry about this one.
KAYLA: Yeah. Sorry.
SARAH: We'll talk about ace things later, don't worry about it.
KAYLA: You just have to make it through this. We should put the time stamp in the bio of, here's when things are okay to listen to and not trash.
SARAH: Oh, I got it. I'm grateful for gummy Lifesavers. The snack. I'm eating some right now. Specifically the orange flavor. I like gummy things. I like orange-flavored things. I don't like oranges that much. I actually don't think I've ever eaten an orange.
KAYLA: What?
SARAH: I've only eaten clementines.
KAYLA: You've never eaten an orange?
SARAH: I've eaten a lot of clementines in my day but I –
KAYLA: How have you never eaten an orange?
SARAH: I don't know.
KAYLA: That makes no sense.
SARAH: I think I may have had like one slice of orange.
KAYLA: You drink orange juice?
SARAH: Yeah. I don't like it that much.
KAYLA: Okay.
(10:00)
SARAH: I'll drink it but it's not my thing. I think I might have had like a slice of orange before, but I've never eaten just like a whole orange.
KAYLA: I mean, I don't think a lot of people do.
SARAH: My dad does.
KAYLA: Actually our roommate does.
SARAH: Anyway, I like citrusy things but –
KAYLA: But only when they're not fruit.
SARAH: Only when they're not in fruit form.
KAYLA: Interesting.
SARAH: I mean I like lemon water. That is from the fruit, but it's water.
KAYLA: That's just water for fancy people.
SARAH: Yeah, so gummy things. Whoa, Trolli sour gummy worms.
KAYLA: I'm a big fan of those. I'm also a bit fan of the Trolli – I wish we were sponsored. Trolli sour – The octopi.
SARAH: I don't like the octopi, because the flavor's different.
KAYLA: I like them.
SARAH: Also, how am I supposed to eat those? I'm very systematic.
KAYLA: Head first.
SARAH: Oh, absolutely not. You eat all the legs first. What?
KAYLA: Okay, first of all, go get checked for your OCD.
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: Second of all –
SARAH: Anyway. Yeah, no, also they changed their recipe a little bit the past couple of years.
KAYLA: Oh, she's a gummy worm connoisseur.
SARAH: I am. So the ones in Germany still taste like they used to, and I think I like those better, but I have gotten used to the newer ones now.
KAYLA: I'm so glad that you've been able to get through this terrible time for you.
SARAH: I know. Thank you. But those are my two favorite types of gummy food.
KAYLA: You should open a PO box and ask for gummy food.
SARAH: Amazing. Kayla, what are you – Thankful or grateful? Thankful.
KAYLA: Just either, I suppose.
SARAH: It's Thanksgiving.
KAYLA: Great giving. The next thing I'm grateful for is visors.
SARAH: Get out of my house.
KAYLA: Because I just think they're so funny. Here's what I'm confused about with a visor. Who was sitting in their house and was like –
SARAH: In their house? You assume they had a house. That's rude.
KAYLA: Who was sitting in their cardboard box?
SARAH: (laughs) Oh wow. Are you assuming they're impoverished?
KAYLA: Well they were until they got the visor idea, and then whoo, mansion. So they were sitting wherever they lived
SARAH: What if they don't live anywhere?
KAYLA: Shut the fuck up.
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: And they were like, you know what hats don't need? Just the entire top. Like, who –
SARAH: Top of their head was getting warm.
KAYLA: Was it an accident or someone cut off the top of their hat and then was like, this looks like something?
SARAH: Maybe. They can't have been bald, because then they would burn their head.
KAYLA: Yeah. Bald people – I feel like they shouldn't wear a visor.
SARAH: I'm just imagining a bald person in a visor. I'm googling it.
KAYLA: Oh no. While you do that – Oh my God, before I say that, I saw someone on Twitter post – It was like, podcast bingo, just for listening to podcasts in general. And one of the things was typing sounds in the background.
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: So if you're playing, you know. My favorite type of visor is the one with Guy Fieri hair on the top.
SARAH: A bunch of those just came up actually, yeah.
KAYLA: Is that what bald people wear?
SARAH: Yeah. No. But I do see a couple of bald guys in visors, and it's a little bit alarming. They're actually a little hard to find. Probably because most bald guys don't wear visors.
KAYLA: I don't know why a bald person – I mean, do whatever you want.
SARAH: I mean for fashion, but it's not useful.
KAYLA: It's just seems dangerous, because bald people have to put sunscreen all up on their head.
SARAH: Like protect your face but not your head? Like question mark?
KAYLA: I just feel like hats would be so useful for bald people when it comes to the sun, and then why would you put yourself in a visor?
SARAH: I don't know. So wait, why are you thankful for visors?
KAYLA: It just came into my mind. But now I'm specifically grateful for bald men wearing visors because –
SARAH: I'm anti-grateful for that. Thank you.
KAYLA: I'm thankful for it for mere entertainment purposes, because they're giving us free entertainment. You know?
SARAH: Okay. I am thankful for traveling places. I'm looking at a map.
KAYLA: I knew something was happening.
SARAH: Okay listen, traveling places – I lost my train of thought because –
KAYLA: You like traveling because –
SARAH: Okay. Traveling I think is a good thing – They're screaming downstairs. Traveling I think is a good thing, if you are able to do it. If you are able to go to other places and see the world and visit other cultures, it's good but you have to do it right. You can't be a fucking dick. Well, no. But some people just go places and they just disrespect –
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: If you're going to travel somewhere, you have to respect the culture, and you have to not be a fucking dickwad. Like I was very aware of my American-ness when I was in Europe.
KAYLA: You were. You could pick out an American, you'd be like, I saw an American today.
SARAH: I would actively try to look less American.
KAYLA: I love that.
SARAH: I just would. Because I didn't want to be that person.
KAYLA: That makes sense.
SARAH: But traveling is good. Seeing the world is good, if you're able to do it. Would recommend. I want to go to so many places, but the problem is that a lot of them are in Europe and I'm like, am I racist?
KAYLA: I want to go to Japan really bad.
SARAH: See, here's the thing, I have no urge to go to really any Asian countries, because I'm afraid of the food.
KAYLA: Oh, you do have food problems.
SARAH: Yeah. It's just like a –
KAYLA: You need to go
SARAH: A lot of their foods are mixed together.
KAYLA: You just need to go, and pack a lot of your own food.
SARAH: (laughs) No, that's just like legitimately the kind of main reason that I just –
KAYLA: Doesn't that make you sad that you're – Do you ever feel held back by your food pickiness? Do you feel like you're missing out?
SARAH: No. It's annoying –
KAYLA: I agree.
SARAH: But it's not like I'm like ugh, I wish I were less picky because of the tastes I would enjoy. Like, no.
KAYLA: Well I mean like the – Well, what if you missed out on going to an Asian country, because the food's holding you back? Does that make you sad?
SARAH: I mean if someone were like, Sarah, I'm going to Japan. You want to come with me? I wouldn't be like, no, I don't like sushi.
KAYLA: I could imagine you – Okay, because you pick all your food apart, I could imagine you getting a roll of sushi and then opening it, and then just dicing up the parts and then just eating the rice.
SARAH: I mean I personally thought of it like, I'm going to plan a vacation. I wouldn't be like, I'm going to go to Japan. If someone else were like, hey, Sarah, we're going to Japan, you want to come with me? I'd be like, okay.
KAYLA: When I get rich, we're going to go to Japan.
SARAH: Okay. Because I feel like a lot of the places where I want to visit are very limited to Europe, and that is very –
KAYLA: I want to go to Australia.
SARAH: It's very white America of me. I'd like to go to Australia. I have a friend in Australia who said I could stay with her, so hi Reanna.
KAYLA: Can I come? Can I please come?
SARAH: Probably. She's very nice. But there are a lot of places where it's like, I want to just look up more things about more places, because I want to go to places that aren't just in Europe. I really want to go to Cuba.
KAYLA: Oh. All right.
SARAH: I want to go to Puerto Rico, but that's in the United States. But still, that's still traveling.
KAYLA: It is, fun.
SARAH: I'd like to go to all 50 states, except maybe Alaska. Sorry Alaskans.
KAYLA: Alaska is very pretty.
SARAH: My parents have been there.
KAYLA: You could go on an Alaskan cruise.
SARAH: That's what my parents did for their 20th anniversary, which is why they did it in the summer, and it was not that warm there and my mom loves warmness and was like, why'd we do this? But it was pretty.
KAYLA: Idiot. It's Alaska, what did she expect?
SARAH: I'd like to go to all 50 states, just for fun. I mean I hit a bunch of new ones this summer. I like to go to –
KAYLA: This is a long one.
SARAH: Some places. I don't know. I just really, really want to go to Ireland.
KAYLA: I know. My mom just went. Now I'm pissed about it.
SARAH: (sighs) Yeah. I feel like I'll just feel at home there, you know?
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: All right Kayla, what are you thankful for?
KAYLA: Well, you would think with all that time to think –
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: I just had one. I'm thankful for – Oh, bubble wrap. Sarah, for some reason, has bubble wrap.
SARAH: Yeah. I ordered a bunch of things online, and then I ordered a bunch more because –
KAYLA: I just want to – I might.
SARAH: No, don't do it. Don't ASMR these bitches.
KAYLA: I might edit it out but I'm not putting it close.
SARAH: It picked up.
KAYLA: Is it spiking?
SARAH: Yeah. Can you stop? That's my bubble wrap. I will pop it.
KAYLA: Yeah. I already popped one yesterday.
SARAH: Yeah. I bought some things, and there was a bunch of bubble wrap in there.
KAYLA: Yeah. I'm a fan. I like when you just grab it
SARAH: And you just twist.
KAYLA: And you twist it.
SARAH: Yeah. That's a good one.
KAYLA: I like stepping on it.
SARAH: That's not as fun.
KAYLA: It's not as fun, but it's still a good time.
SARAH: Okay. If you want to streamline the process. It's kind of like stepping on grapes but –
KAYLA: I already have my next one and I feel like I'm going to forget it.
SARAH: Then do it right now.
KAYLA: I'm thankful for soap and here's why is because, if you go on Instagram discover, you will find just videos of people cutting soap.
SARAH: Slime. Cloud slime and icy slime.
KAYLA: She's a big fan. I'll snap at them.
SARAH: Also, I have some Play-Doh over there, and it's just been great.
KAYLA: Interesting. I just love watching people cut soap. And sometimes they do it wrong. Sometimes people do it very wrong, and that makes me upset.
SARAH: Some soaps just don't cut as well, too.
KAYLA: Some are harder and I'm like, why are you even trying with this? Get a different soap.
SARAH: Also, I never listen to the volume on those things. Some people are like they like the ASMR of soap cutting videos and slime videos, and I'm like, no.
KAYLA: I feel like the slime videos I don't like listening to them. The soap ones I like because the squares are so small that it's just like – I like that sound, because it sounds like a noise machine.
SARAH: The slime noise I kind of hate, because first of all the noises always sound much louder than they would be in real life.
KAYLA: Yeah, it's always just like bleurgh, bleurgh.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: It's gross.
(20:00)
SARAH: Also, the one thing I really don't like about the slime community –
KAYLA: This is our worst episode yet.
SARAH: I'm so sorry if y'all are new here.
KAYLA: This is our worst episode ever.
SARAH: It's because you came up with the content idea.
KAYLA: I'm sorry, what was your better idea that you came up with?
SARAH: Dying?
KAYLA: That is a good idea, however I don't think we can do that. Who would edit this and put it up if we both died on air?
SARAH: (laughs) I know, right? On air, as if this is live.
KAYLA: It is.
SARAH: But some of the words they use, when they take cloud slime and they put it from high up above and then they let it kind of drop? They call it drizzling.
KAYLA: That's not drizzling.
SARAH: That's not a liquid.
KAYLA: Here's what I don't like about the slime community. They're just trying to get people to comment –
SARAH: Oh, they always ask questions.
KAYLA: And they're like, one or two? Yes or no? Have you seen a lot of those type of captions?
SARAH: Oh, captions? When you said that I'm thinking of the videos where it's like, on the left half there's one video, on the right half there's another one and they play one after each other. I hate those.
KAYLA: They're like, this is the right way to draw this, and this is the wrong way to draw this.
SARAH: Or they're like, which one is better? And they're like which one's a better a dancer? And I'm like, they're both bad dancers.
KAYLA: Yeah. I don't like the ones it's like you swipe through, and they're like “One or two?” And they're completely different things. Like completely.
SARAH: You just want people to comment to boost you.
KAYLA: They're like, count from 1 to 99 in the comments. Only 5% of the people can get there. And I'm like, who's falling for this? So anyway, that's something I'm not thankful for.
SARAH: Anti-thankful for that. Oh I don't have anything else.
KAYLA: You got it. I believe in you. Don't just look around your room.
SARAH: I'm thankful for my ADHD medication.
KAYLA: Oh my God. All right.
SARAH: Listen. My brain.
KAYLA: She's hurt.
SARAH: Disagreeable.
KAYLA: She's hurt.
SARAH: She's hurt.
KAYLA: I feel like she is. You've had quite the week.
SARAH: Oh, I've had quite the week.
KAYLA: She's probably sad.
SARAH: I'm sorry, world. Sorry for this content. (laughs)
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: And now I have to another one, because you did two in a row.
KAYLA: Oh yeah, you should. I had another one already.
SARAH: Go.
KAYLA: Oh, I'm thankful for therapy, because recently I started going back to therapy and it has been magical.
SARAH: It's been doing magic? What spells have you learned? Alohomora.
KAYLA: I'm trying to think of a really good pun about depression, and making into a Harry Potter spell. I truly didn't come –
SARAH: Depressio goneo.
KAYLA: Ooh, that is so good Sarah.
SARAH: Oh, it was amazing.
KAYLA: That was really magical. But yeah, it's been very good and insightful, and a good time.
SARAH: That's good.
KAYLA: And today I was telling my therapist about this inner conflict I'm having about this thing going on in my life. And she goes, you should just sit in that. She was like, just hold the conflict. Don't go one way or the other. Just sit in it. And I was like, that is the thing – I don't want to do that. And she's right. It is good for me, if I am going to follow that advice.
SARAH: See, they always tell you things that are good for you but you just don’t want to do that.
KAYLA: I think I’m very – I don't think I'm going to do a good job of following it. I know myself, and I don't –
SARAH: Big mood.
KAYLA: I don't think I'm going to sit in it very well. I think I'm probably going to get out of it. Anyway.
SARAH: Therapy with Kayla and Sarah, every Sunday here at Sounds Fake Pod.
KAYLA: That's kind of true though. Anyway, despite me maybe not following this advice, it has been really helpful. And if you have the resources, I would highly recommend it. Wven if there's not anything crazy going on in your life – At this point I'm just working through very internal things, and it's very helpful.
SARAH: Like your organs, and your esophagus.
KAYLA: Yeah. (laughs)
SARAH: I'm thankful (pause) for books.
KAYLA: You just looked at your bookshelf.
SARAH: No, but I –
KAYLA: All you did was –
SARAH: Oh, no, no, here's the thing, here's the thing. I am thankful for books, I just never get to read them. So I pre-ordered the new – not the new. The Hank Green book, An Absolutely Remarkable Thing. It came the day it came out, which was September 25th.
KAYLA: She has not read it.
SARAH: I haven't read it. I just don't have time.
KAYLA: I was walking through our campus the other day in what is called The Diag, if you go here you're familiar with it, it's like our center of campus. And sometimes people are just around like handing out flyers, or talking about Jesus, or screaming political things. You know, the usual. But these people are just handing out books. Like hard cover novels.
SARAH: They were hard covers?
KAYLA: Yeah. I'll show you. And I was like, yeah, I'm going to take this from you. And it's this book that this guy wrote, and there's an app that goes with it so it's like a whole digital experience. There's music that can go with it and pictures. And it seems very gimmicky and I started skimming it, because I went to class and then I was there early, so I was just skimming it. And then all of a sudden, the first two pages there was something about semen. And I was like, truly what? But that was wild. They were just like – Is that the way you market books now is just like handing them out?
SARAH: Internet. I don't know. I think reading is such a good thing.
KAYLA: You love reading.
SARAH: I just don't do enough of it. When I was in like middle school, I would just be like –
KAYLA: A bitch used to read.
SARAH: A bitch used to read. You know what I used to do? It would be summer vacation. I'd just be sitting in my room and I'd just pick a Harry Potter book. I would just open it to any random page, and just start reading it.
KAYLA: I miss reading so much.
SARAH: Same. And I have so many books to read.
KAYLA: I know. Me too.
SARAH: I have quite a few books here. I have some books at home. I own these books.
KAYLA: Yep.
SARAH: And I haven't read them.
KAYLA: And I love going to book stores too.
SARAH: Same. And that's why I just keep getting more books.
KAYLA: I used to read all the time, and now I have to read for school all the time, so I don't want to – Ugh, I love reading.
SARAH: Yeah. I got this book for school and I didn't have assigned readings from it, but my professor was like, you should buy this and you should read it. And I actually really want to read it because it's about TV writing. There are a lot of books about the film industry that have been recommended to me, that I really want to read. I don't have time.
KAYLA: I've also seen a lot of books about asexuality. There's one that, I forget. It's about a black asexual girl.
SARAH: Oh, beautiful.
KAYLA: And it was big on Tumblr. And one of you actually sent it and was like, you guys should read this and I want to, but I'm also dying.
SARAH: I would love to. Yeah. And I was like, oh maybe I'll have time to like read a book over Thanksgiving break. No, I won't. Don't fuck with yourself, Sarah. You're not going to do that. Yeah. I miss being having the time to read.
KAYLA: This is just depressing.
SARAH: Yeah. This is supposed to be uplifting, and now here we are.
KAYLA: All right, what's an uplifting thing to be thankful for?
SARAH: I'm thankful for snow.
KAYLA: The snow has been very pretty recently.
SARAH: Here's a thing what Michigan decided to do.
KAYLA: She went for it.
SARAH: This is what? The fifth time it snowed?
KAYLA: Yeah, maybe.
SARAH: It's currently November 15th. It has snowed five times this month already. That's unusual. It's not unheard of that it would snow. It's not unheard of to snow before Thanksgiving. It happens. But that it would snow five times before Thanksgiving?
KAYLA: It's been snowing all week. And it snowed all day today.
SARAH: It snowed all day today and I was wearing my white Converse because I didn't anticipate that, and I was like, oh no.
KAYLA: Yeah. It's not good.
SARAH: But here's the thing, it was so – I think I mentioned this before. It was so hot for so long this fall, it was in the 80s several times in October. Multiple times in October. And so a lot of the trees still have leaves on them.
KAYLA: (laughs) They really do. They're very confused.
SARAH: Some trees are just straight up green.
KAYLA: They're very confused.
SARAH: It's pretty because you have a bunch of snow on these – And there's more surface area on the leaves. So there's more snow on the trees but then when the wind comes? There's more snow that just like blows off the –
KAYLA: Is that why it's been wild?
SARAH: That's why it's been like that is because then you just get attacked by snow when you pass by, and it's like, trees just get rid of your leaves. Go, go, go. Get rid of them. It's too cold.
KAYLA: Similarly, I am thankful for fall leaves. Because they're very pretty.
SARAH: Cronchy.
KAYLA: Especially – I love cronching them, first of all. Always go out of your way to crinch a leaf.
SARAH: Important.
KAYLA: So it sucks now too, that we missed – There was only a small window of leaf cronching this year.
SARAH: Oh there was about one day of leaf cronching.
KAYLA: But the trees on our campus are always very beautiful and orange, and in my office, our whole window was just orange, and so it would make this orange glow go into our office –
SARAH: Stunning.
KAYLA: And it was so pretty and now it's just dead.
SARAH: At people who live in places where leaves don't fall off of trees, what?
KAYLA: Boo. Sorry.
SARAH: Warm weather, get out. Get out of here.
KAYLA: I was talking to a colleague today –
SARAH: A colleague?
KAYLA: Because I'm a professional. And she's from California, and she was just saying how much extra you don't think about when you don't live here. She was talking about – Just clothes. She was like, I've heard you shouldn't wear cotton because it holds water more, and wool is better. And I was like, I've never thought about that, I just live. And she was like, I started showering at different times so my hair didn't freeze. We were just talking, she was like, I used to only wear crop tops, now I can't wear anything.
SARAH: I can't believe she walks outside naked in this weather. (laughs)
KAYLA: And now she walks around naked. Yeah.
SARAH: You have to have – You are forced to own a greater quantity of clothes. Because you have to have a broader range of clothes.
KAYLA: You have a full second wardrobe.
(30:00)
SARAH: Right. That's why when I went to Germany, I had to bring winter clothes and summer clothes, and then that took up so much more space because it was like, I had to bring clothes for more than one season.
KAYLA: Okay. I'm going to give you a two for one. Something I am thankful for that simultaneously I'm not thankful for.
SARAH: BOGO, buy one get one –
BOTH: (laugh)
KAYLA: I hate you. One, is I'm very thankful for large sweatshirts, because I just love wearing large clothes.
SARAH: Also the large sweaters. I always buy sweaters a size up.
KAYLA: Yeah. I have at least three sweatshirts that are like XLs. Because I'm a small person in the first place and so I just like being in big things, I just like being. Here's the bad part of that –
SARAH: They take up a lot of space.
KAYLA: Yeah. And here's where they take up the most space is the laundry. When you're packing, yes, but the laundry. The laundry gets – I have to worry about how full it's getting more during the winter, because my clothes are bulkier.
SARAH: Got to do more loads of laundry.
KAYLA: And I don't have – So I need to do laundry. I have one pair of underwear left, speaking of.
SARAH: Oh yeah, I – Yeah. Also, my clothes are always just in general darker in the winter. (laughs)
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: See, this is – We're trying to be uplifting, and here we are.
KAYLA: But there's always something. Okay. We've got to be able to think of one very good thing.
SARAH: How serious do we want it to –
KAYLA: I mean, we're going to get serious. We can slowly transition into being serious.
SARAH: No. I'm thankful for podcasts. This is a bit of a jump to what we're going to talk about at the end but just in general, I've gotten really into podcasts recently, which is a weird thing to say when you've had a podcast for a year. However, previously I liked podcasts, but I didn't have a lot of opportunities to listen to them because as I've mentioned before, I have very specific circumstances. I have to be walking – Sometimes I do it when I'm working out, or cleaning. Those are the only times I can listen to podcasts, otherwise I'll just get distracted by whatever else is going on. So I've started being like, you know what? I'm just going to listen to a podcast while I'm walking to class.
KAYLA: I do that.
SARAH: Because usually I would just be like, I'm going to listen to music. But now it depends on how I'm feeling. A lot of times in the mornings, I'll listen to podcasts.
KAYLA: I do that.
SARAH: Or while I'm getting ready in the morning, I can listen to a podcast. So I've been listening to them more, and so I've been able to listen to more podcasts. And honestly, podcasts are great. Also because it's a thing that I enjoy doing, that doesn't take extra time.
KAYLA: I know. So it's like, mini self-care.
SARAH: Right. So it's like I'm still walking to class like I normally would have to, but I'm getting to do something that I actually enjoy also at the same time.
KAYLA: It is a good time. I also like podcasts. I had some free time, which was wild, yesterday so I was catching up on some – I'm a big fan of the crime podcasts. And they're just such a good time, because there's so many genres. You have fiction, nonfiction, and then you can learn about truly anything you want.
SARAH: You really, really can.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: For example, ace umbrella issues. It sounds fake, but okay.
KAYLA: It is very cool though that the barrier to entry for podcasts is so low that, I mean –
SARAH: Yeah. I mean, the joke is that everyone has a podcast, but also everyone can have a podcast.
KAYLA: Yeah. It's like when you used to have a band in your garage. Now you just –
SARAH: You just have GarageBand which is where you record your podcast.
KAYLA: You have GarageBand and that's how you record your podcast.
SARAH: Yeah. See, that was completely uplifting.
KAYLA: What a time to be alive.
SARAH: All right. What are you thankful for?
KAYLA: I'm thankful for –
SARAH: This is your last one before we get serious.
KAYLA: Oh shit.
SARAH: It's time to get serious.
KAYLA: Oh fuck. (sings) Let's get serious. Serious.
SARAH: I was trying to sing a song and it didn't come out right.
KAYLA: Hold on. I'm thinking.
SARAH: Literally, how dare you.
KAYLA: It really hurts. I'm thankful for inside jokes.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Yes. What were you going to say? She's chewing.
SARAH: No. I just put a Life Saver in my mouth.
KAYLA: She has a Life Saver in her mouth. I just think it's so fun when you can just know someone or talk to them enough, and then you can just look at them, or just give them a look – Okay, I have another thing. This is the thing I thought of in class. So I have this one and then I have another one.
SARAH: My eyes are so dry.
KAYLA: Her eyes are so dry.
SARAH: I don’t know what happened. It's probably because I don't sleep. What are they yelling about?
KAYLA: Someone's yelling downstairs. This is what happens when you don't have a studio.
BOTH: (laugh)
KAYLA: Okay. So yeah, I'm thankful for inside jokes. Because you can just look at someone a certain way, or say a very little thing – Stop. Sarah's doing a thing, and I don't like it.
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: But it's such a nice intimint thing.
SARAH: Intimint.
KAYLA: Stop.
SARAH: So then you're intimint with a mint. (laughs)
KAYLA: I'm not doing this anymore. My other one that kind of was related –
SARAH: Wait. No, I have a thing to say about that.
KAYLA: (sighs) Fine.
SARAH: I realized the other day – Because sometimes you have, they're not always inside jokes, but they're like inside things. Like, it makes you think of something and you're like, ah, what a nice memory, even if it's not a joke.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: I realized the other day I had deja vu of that sort of situation, but then I realized that it was just an inside joke with myself?
KAYLA: (laughs)
SARAH: And I didn't have anyone to tell about it, so I was going to come home and tell you, and then you weren't there and I was like, anyone else I could tell would think I'm weird.
KAYLA: I would love to hear it, please.
SARAH: I was walking back from working out, and you know how like if you come to our house from the hill, you have to go up the hill on our street?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: So I was walking up that hill.
KAYLA: It's a very tall hill.
SARAH: It was nighttime, and it was a colder temperature, and the song Another Day of Sun from La La Land came on. And I was walking up the hill listening to that song, and I was like, I used to do this all the time in Germany when I was in Schwäbisch Hall because my host family lived –
KAYLA: That's true. See, that's not totally an inside joke because you told me about that.
SARAH: Right. But it's like, I was the only one who actually experienced that.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: You know?
KAYLA: I feel like I had that the other day. I was on said hill, and we used to live there. And the specific view of the sunset you get, or at least the sunsets that I always saw, they had a very specific color.
SARAH: They do. Wait, they do.
KAYLA: The pink-purple color.
SARAH: Whoa.
KAYLA: So I was walking – I think it was this fall, when we came back to school. And I was walking I think in that area, and I saw a sunset that was that color. And it made me so nostalgic for our freshman year, it hurt, how nostalgic it was for freshman year.
SARAH: Yeah. And I mentioned this before, I associate songs very much with memories.
KAYLA: There's a whole album that came out, our freshman year, the Pentatonix original album? Listening to that album while walking, especially in warm weather, it makes my heart hurt with nostalgia.
SARAH: Yes, ugh. I hate it.
KAYLA: But it's also – Like how special is that, you know?
SARAH: It's dumb.
KAYLA: I know.
SARAH: Yeah, no. I mean, that's what happened when I was walking. I kind of think of that whenever I hear that song, but especially because it was nighttime, it was the right temperature, I was walking up a hill. Songs can trigger very specific memories for me, because for some reason that's what my brain does. And they don't even have to be actually memorable things. It's just like a very specific moment in time that I was like, got that. I got it.
KAYLA: She's got it. My one that was kind of related I thought of was just, eye contact.
SARAH: Why are you grateful for eye contact?
KAYLA: Here’s – Okay, I’ll tell you –
SARAH: Oh, I know what you're talking about.
KAYLA: Well no. I am talking about what I’m thinking of, but I thought it before that. I was in class and there's this kid in my class who's just – Sometimes he says things, and everyone in class, we all have a mutual feeling. You know when an annoying person starts to speak in class?
SARAH: Oh yeah. One of those in my class today.
KAYLA: Yeah. And so what I was thankful for – And this is what I wrote down in my notebook that I couldn't remember, was that you can just look at someone while that's happening, and just feel that. Or like earlier today something happened in our house, and I was trying to make what I call meaningful eye contact with one of my housemates about the situation? Just to be like, ah, do you see what I see? But I just think that’s so fun that you can just look at someone, and then just be like –
SARAH: Yeah. I have one last thing that I'm thankful for that I want to mention, before we get to the more serious things. But this is more serious, and it is kind of a nice transition.
KAYLA: We're transitioning.
SARAH: Yeah. So I today was at this Q&A session presentation thing with this showrunner of the show One Day at a Time on Netflix, and a professor from Emerson. And they were just talking about diversity in Hollywood, and especially women and Latinx shenanigans. And there was a Q&A thing and a kid who I considered myself to be like, you know, we're buds. We're not like BFFs, but we're friends. And he walks up and he was like, hey, as a straight white guy, I have had experiences where minority people are getting steamrolled when we're in – Because we were talking about how the film industry is like, even if the numbers are equal, it's not actually equitable.
And so he was like, there was an example of the specific time where I was in a group where there was one girl and a bunch of guys. And he was like, and the one girl was the writer, and she just kept getting steamroll by all the other guys. And he was like, and I would try to encourage the other guys to not do that, but they didn't always listen. And he was like, so how can I be better at that?
(40:00)
And they were like, first of all, thank you. But in that story that he was talking about? I was the girl.
KAYLA: It was you.
SARAH: Yeah. And so afterwards I was like, hey, thank you for saying that. And he was like, I didn't even realize you were here. I was like, I am here. (laughs)
KAYLA: It's me.
SARAH: And he was like, I hope it was okay, was it good? I said, it was. And I was like, at the time when it was happening, I didn't even really notice it that much, because I was used to it and I kind of anticipated it? Me and six guys, yeah, of course that's going to happen. But then because he noticed it and he was saying – In hindsight it's like, I think it was worse than I thought it was, because it was so internalized. But I'm thankful that he is self-aware and wants to make change, and that he did try to make sure that I wasn't getting steamrolled, even though I still did.
KAYLA: Yeah. I am very grateful for majority people that are aware of their power, and are doing their best.
SARAH: They want to do good things with it.
KAYLA: Yeah. Because it's hard with how ingrained things are, everyone's going to have some internal bias that is just – They can't help. But the fact that people are consciously aware that they hold a certain amount of power, and that there's something they can do I think is –
SARAH: Right. And I try very hard to be – I'm a member of handful of minority groups as a woman, and as an ace person. But I also am a white person, and I also am a person who is financially doing fine. So I have a lot of privilege, and I try to use that privilege for good, but who even knows?
KAYLA: Truly, who knows?
SARAH: You know. But we're also very thankful for – Okay, I have one more transition thing. It's the one I wrote down earlier.
KAYLA: All right.
SARAH: I'm thankful for this podcast. We're a lot more organized now, and we post regularly, we actually post on Sundays.
KAYLA: Yeah last year was a mess.
SARAH: Over the summer we had to – We were forced to –
KAYLA: Recording over the summer was hard, because we did it remotely and we were in different timezones, and we were both working. So it would be 10pm for me, and you would have just gotten home from work, and you were eating dinner. So I would be laying in bed exhausted, because I was working at eight or whatever, so I had to wake up early. But it did force us – We were like okay, we have to do it at this day. We have to do it. And so now this year, I think we're a lot better of like okay, it has to get done.
SARAH: Also because we changed our perks so that some patrons get it a day earlier, so we have to have it ready a day early.
KAYLA: Which is good I think for us though. It forces us to –
SARAH: It is good. But yeah, we're also just way more organized, I made the whole table about what we're doing, and we mark down what has been recorded, what has been edited, what has been posted and it's just – Look at us. Business women.
KAYLA: In general, I'm thankful for this podcast because it's a nice outlet that isn't school-related, but it still gets at a lot of things I'm interested in.
SARAH: I feel like it's a productive thing for me to be doing. The fact that I think that way is sad, I'm just a product of capitalism that I think I have to be productive in the things I'm doing. But I do think that way because I'm a product of capitalism. I feel like it's something that I'm getting things out of. I feel like it's something I'm enjoying with, but I'm not like – It's not like I'm wasting my time.
KAYLA: Yeah. It's something I genuinely enjoy, and I think is a good self-care thing to have a project that you want to put things into. But also, it's on my resume, people ask me about it and it has benefits in that sense.
SARAH: It may or may not go on my resume, depending on what I'm applying to.
KAYLA: I think it could help you in general.
SARAH: Yeah. But it's just like, I only got so much space on my resume.
KAYLA: That's true.
SARAH: I have a lot of screenwriting classes to put on there.
KAYLA: That’s true. I've had a lot of people just – They'll stop the interview to be like, Oh, you have a podcast.
SARAH: I've had people stop – Well, because the things that are on my resume, it's like Quidditch. An organization that is called NERDS. (laughs)
KAYLA: I've had several people stop and just ask me about that whole section of my resume. But in general, I am very grateful for it because I like having a project and I feel like – I don't know. It's like a good friendship thing.
SARAH: I think yeah. It is.
KAYLA: Because also –
SARAH: Because we just have to sit here and talk to each other.
KAYLA: Well, also but I'm really bad at keeping in touch with people, but over the summer I was like well, I have to talk to Sarah all the time, because we're business women together.
SARAH: We're business women. Yeah. That's why I have Snapchat streaks with people. Is because it forces me to –
KAYLA: I'm so bad at keeping up with people.
SARAH: Even if we don't really talk every day, we interact every day.
KAYLA: You at least see their face.
SARAH: Yeah. Or their cat.
KAYLA: I want to say hi to their cat.
SARAH: Yeah. Talking about this part of ourselves I think is also good. I know I've learned a lot about myself. I think you've learned even more about yourself.
KAYLA: Yeah, yeah.
SARAH: From this whole shenanigans. I mean you can track your arc through our episodes.
KAYLA: If you listen from the beginning, which I feel like – I don't know. Might be an interesting thing, if I could sit through it one day.
SARAH: I don't know if I could do it.
KAYLA: Because I think the beginning ones are so cringey.
SARAH: Our early ones are pretty bad.
KAYLA: I know some of you that are recent, new listeners have gone through from the beginning.
SARAH: How did you do it? Are you okay?
KAYLA: Which I think must have been a wild experience. But yeah, for me, if you really think about, this podcast has seen me through two real relationships, a few situationships.
SARAH: (laughs) Situationships.
KAYLA: The realization of my sexuality. The acceptance of my sexuality. Even for selfish purposes, it's kind of like a diary.
SARAH: Because we give you all of our bullshit.
KAYLA: But yeah, I do think I've learned a lot, and also it's kind of reassuring that even if I – Because I would love to make a career out of something sexuality-related, something like that. And I know that's not super viable for short term, like, getting a job right now. I just need to get a job. But it's nice to know that even if I can't do that in my day job, that's something I can still do meaningfully in my life.
SARAH: Yeah. You know what else I'm thankful for?
KAYLA: What?
SARAH: I'm thankful for our listeners, for listening to us.
KAYLA: Me too. Because why are they doing that?
SARAH: I know, right? Because here's what I'm wondering. If no one listened to us, would we have kept doing it this long?
KAYLA: I wonder that too because in the beginning, it started out as just people we knew, and then we've slowly accumulated more and more and more people we don't know. Hi guys. Remember when we first started and we had our Twitter, and people would follow us and I'd be like, do you know this person? And you were like, no, do you know this person? We'd be like (gasps)
SARAH: Yeah. (laughs)
KAYLA: Do you remember that? It was like a big thing when someone we didn't knew followed us.
SARAH: We didn't knew.
KAYLA: Yes. And then AVEN retweeted us a couple of times, and that was –
SARAH: And now AVEN retweets us all the time.
KAYLA: That's not true. It's like a couple times.
SARAH: It's occasionally. It's a common occurrence.
KAYLA: It's a common occurrence. And then we got recognition from The Spectrum Center here. Recently we've had a couple people do fan art, which is like wild to me.
SARAH: It's crazy. It’s kind of weird to think of yourself as – Obviously we're not famous.
KAYLA: We're not famous.
SARAH: But it is weird to think of the way that I know the people who I follow on the internet, like YouTubers or like podcasters or whatever. The way I know them there are people out there who know us that way. It's so strange to me.
KAYLA: That is really weird to think about. And also I don't think it's ever properly hit me and it still doesn't, that people know us in that way.
SARAH: I can understand why people of the internet feel that way now, now that I'm actually able to experience it to some extent, even though obviously I don't have five million followers.
KAYLA: Well, it's also interesting because people message us and email us with very intimate details of their lives, and I really enjoy getting those emails because it just means a lot.
SARAH: And you can just kind of jump into conversations with people.
KAYLA: Yeah. Like Sarah recently – We have a listener from –
SARAH: It was the greatest. I lost my fucking shit.
KAYLA: We have a listener from Germany. If you're listening, hello.
SARAH: Hello.
KAYLA: And so they DM'd us and were talking to Sarah in German and Sarah –
SARAH: Yeah. And they said some stuff in German and I was like I'm going to answer in German.
KAYLA: And Sarah loves that, so I think that experience I feel like was very cool.
SARAH: We had a little back and forth speaking in German.
KAYLA: Yeah. Which is cool.
SARAH: Well we weren't speaking, we were writing in German. Whatever.
KAYLA: But people will just tell us their life story. They'll trust us with this information. They're like, no one else knows this, but I trust you enough to give this to you.
SARAH: Sometimes it's like, I don't even know how to react. I don't even really know what to say to this. But I'm glad that you trust us enough to feel comfortable. And I'm glad that we're a place that you feel you can go to.
KAYLA: Yeah. It's weird. Because it never properly hits me, I don't think, when those things come in. I'm like oh –
SARAH: Cool, we got an email.
KAYLA: Obviously we appreciate it greatly, but it has never hit me on the level that I think it should.
SARAH: Like sitting down and just thinking about it.
KAYLA: Thinking about it, it makes me emotional.
SARAH: I think the thing that really is crazy to me is people who live in other countries.
KAYLA: That's true. We have people in some random countries.
(50:00)
SARAH: How dare you call their countries random, Kayla? They're not random to them. (laughs)
KAYLA: Of course not. But I think of random as like –
SARAH: We wouldn't expect –
KAYLA: You just like wouldn't expect. Because I feel like I would expect the UK, or Australia –
SARAH: English-speaking countries.
KAYLA: English-speaking countries. But there's like non English-speaking countries that are just like, hey.
SARAH: Hey guys.
KAYLA: And I'm like, hello.
SARAH: Hello deutschsprachige Leuten. I just said that wrong. I said Leuten’, it should’ve been ‘Leute’.”
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: I finally learned when I need to add the N on the things.
KAYLA: I'm so proud. It's only been like, six years.
SARAH: And now I'm doing it too much.
KAYLA: Ah, good.
SARAH: Hey, I recently learned that my German is – I'm much more intuitive with grammatical things now.
KAYLA: I'm very glad.
SARAH: It's great. My German is better than it used to be.
KAYLA: I'm so proud.
SARAH: Wow.
KAYLA: You would hope that happens after learning.
SARAH: I can like think better – I was telling Kayla the other day, I can think in German now a lot better, and sometimes I get stuck in it.
KAYLA: She gets stuck.
SARAH: Okay. Anyway. We're thankful for our patrons on Patreon.
KAYLA: Yeah. I don't think that's something we talk about enough either.
SARAH: Because sometimes we end up just flying through it, because we end up talking too long and it's like we don't want to
KAYLA: Which is bad and I told Sarah we need to stop doing that, because there are people –
SARAH: They give us their money.
KAYLA: How many do we have?
SARAH: Eight.
KAYLA: Eight. There are eight people out there –
SARAH: Over the past year we've had a total of maybe 12.
KAYLA: Some people have come in and out.
SARAH: 12 or 15. Yeah.
KAYLA: But there are people who, with their income – And some of these people are people we're friends with, so these are like other students. And a lot of them are other young people, we've talked to them and they're young professionals. And they're like, you know what I'm going to do with this extra money that I have?
SARAH: My well-earned money that I worked hard to get.
KAYLA: They're just giving it to us.
SARAH: Are they okay?
KAYLA: It's not like they're giving to us for free because –
SARAH: There's an exchange of goods and services.
KAYLA: We're providing a service. Would I say this is a service that's worth money?
SARAH: To some people, maybe. And that's the crazy part.
KAYLA: That is the truly craziest part is that people – Not to say that money is the value, because obviously there's a lot of people that get a lot value out of this that aren't paying us, which is completely fine.
SARAH: Right. Of course. Yeah.
KAYLA: But some people are like, they value this so much that it justifies them paying us, like giving us money.
SARAH: Even if it's just $2 a month.
KAYLA: Which has allowed us though to make this so much bigger. Like we have microphones now. We don't have to worry about –
SARAH: Paying for SoundCloud.
KAYLA: Paying for things. It just allows us to just kind of do what we want to do freely, which I think if we didn't, I think we'd have to be a lot more worried about what we were doing.
SARAH: Yeah. Also if people didn't actually listen to this, would we have renewed our SoundCloud?
KAYLA: Well that's true. Yeah. We renewed our SoundCloud for the second year.
SARAH: Would we have just done it out of pocket?
KAYLA: The crazy thing was I was like, Sarah, we're renewing our SoundCloud. And she was like, okay. And I was like, all right, I'm taking the money out of Patreon, and we're going to pay $2 each out of pocket. And it wasn't a big thing.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I was just like, hey Sarah, this is happening, and you were like, okay. The fact that I could just do that is crazy to me.
SARAH: And we started this for us, because we thought it would be fun. And we still do it for us, but we also actually have other people that care about it. So it is kind of this weird dichotomy is like, on one hand we're not doing this because we want to get famous.
KAYLA: It's obviously not going to happen.
SARAH: But we do have people who enjoy it and we feel indebted to them in some way.
KAYLA: Which we should.
SARAH: Yeah. And I think rightfully so. I don't owe y'all my life but I appreciate y'all.
KAYLA: But we own you content. We owe you –
SARAH: I guess the people who are paying, we probably owe them contact, but like we don't owe anyone anything. But we do.
KAYLA: But like we do. Yeah.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: It's like, if we stopped I wouldn't be like
SARAH: I would feel guilty.
KAYLA: Yeah, I don't know. But we do, because people have put – Especially people that have told us very intimate things about their lives and everything. Like I feel like –
SARAH: People who throw money at us.
KAYLA: People who throw money at us, especially. It's like, you do owe them something because we're just throwing this out into the world and people care enough to spend time listening to it, when they could be doing a lot of other things.
SARAH: Yeah. I'm also grateful for just the community. As I said before, I don't always feel like I'm super inside the community. Sometimes I just feel like I'm like, okay, yeah, I see you. I'm in it, but I'm over here. But even then, I think it's a good community to be in, and I'm glad that we've kind of become a slightly more active part of it.
My eyes are really so dry. Can you just make me cry? It'll solve the problem.
KAYLA: I don't want to do that, because I think I could really send you spiraling right now.
SARAH: That's so true. I could cry at any time.
KAYLA: I really am afraid to say anything that would make you cry. I could think of some things but –
SARAH: Excuse you.
KAYLA: I mean, that's fine.
SARAH: Anyway, the community, Kayla.
KAYLA: Yes. I would say I don't feel like I'm a huge part of it either, just because I don't actively participate online I don't think a lot. A lot of people post a lot of original content, or have friends in the community from online, and I just don't think I do. But the fact that I'll go on our Tumblr and go on our Twitter and see so much positivity, and know that if I wanted to reach out to someone, that I would be welcome to do that.
SARAH: Well, it's like people know that if they reach out to us, we're going to answer them. We're going to have a little dialog, we're going to be buds, it's chill. Feeling that way about other people in the community too is a good thing.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: I'm also thankful for the people around me who are cool with my sexuality. (laughs) Just who I am as a person generally.
KAYLA: Yeah, that's a tough one.
SARAH: I got some cool people in my life. Kayla's not one of them.
KAYLA: Dammit.
SARAH: But pretty much everyone else is kind of good ,and I feel kind of lucky, but also for those of you if you don't necessarily have good people in your life – I don't know why I'm talking like this. Those of you who may not be in as good a position as Kayla or I, we here for you, bud. Send us a Twitter message, I don't know.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: We're here for you. And if you have people who are there for you, who are great, then more power to you. But if not, also more power to you.
KAYLA: You're not alone in that problem.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I don't think. Like it definitely sucks but – There’s no way, because I'm not going to sit here and be the “it gets better” campaign, because that campaign is bullshit.
SARAH: I know that people who say it, I know they really mean it. But a lot of times, that's not what you necessarily need to hear.
KAYLA: Well a lot of the times people that are saying it too are rich and white.
SARAH: Well right.
KAYLA: And also it's just belittling your current experience to be like, well it doesn't matter what you're going through right now, because it'll get better eventually.
SARAH: Also it's like when people put sticky notes up that are like, you're beautiful, you're loved. And I'm like, you don't know me. Stop it.
KAYLA: And that's not to say – I mean we don't know you either, I guess.
SARAH: Yeah. Some people that makes them feel great, for me it just kind of pisses me off. Anyway.
KAYLA: But anyway if you are in that situation, know that a lot of the people that listen to this are very nice, and so you can reach out to them and be friends. My greatest wish is for people that listen to this to become friends.
SARAH: QPR, QPR.
KAYLA: Honestly, my greatest wish is for people to just start talking off of one of our tweets or something, and just be friends. That is my greatest wish, so if any of you want to become friends and make that true –
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: But anyway, we're here and the community is here, and hopefully eventually you'll get into a better situation. And know that you deserve a better situation.
SARAH: Retweet.
KAYLA: If you're in a situation right now where maybe your friends aren't the greatest or your family isn't the greatest, if you have a way to get out –
SARAH: Take it.
KAYLA: Do it. Like you deserve to care for yourself.
SARAH: No one deserves to feel like shit because of who they are. I don't care what you think about yourself or what you think you deserve, I can tell you right now, no human being deserves that.
KAYLA: Yeah. So if you have the opportunity to cut some people out, or gain some new people, you owe it to yourself.
SARAH: True. So TL;DR, cheese and the community. Yeah. Anything else? No.
KAYLA: Cool. All right.
SARAH: Get out of here. All right, no. Don't leave yet.
KAYLA: What is happening?
SARAH: What's our poll? I kind of almost wanted another open-ended poll where we just kind of ask what people are thankful for?
KAYLA: Yeah. I want to see what people are thankful for. Let's do that.
SARAH: What are you thankful for? Try not to be passive aggressive. That's a problem I find that I have. Okay, here's a thing I like to do. You know how some people are like, I always pray before I go to bed. Or I always pray before –
KAYLA: Do you just be passive aggressive before you go to bed? (laughs)
(1:00:00)
SARAH: No. But there's things where someone is like, I grew up in a family where – Not me, but this person was saying that they grew up in a family where you'd always pray before dinner, and they're not religious anymore, but they like that ritual. And this was on Dear Hank and John of course. And so John was like, what my family does a lot is we'll say things that we're grateful for. And he's like, I never let them say the same thing more than one day in a row, otherwise it will constantly be the same TV show.
BOTH: (laugh)
KAYLA: That’s funny.
SARAH: But I was like, huh, that's an interesting thing. Because back in – There was a time in my life where I was sort of religious. Not anymore. But it used to be a thing where I'd be like, you could pray before you go to bed. And now I try to just be like come up three things I'm grateful for. And I try to make them all different every time.
KAYLA: I've heard that actually helps, if you keep a journal of just writing down things that you're thankful for, that it does help your mental state.
SARAH: And sometimes I get passive aggressive because I'll be like, I'm grateful for when X thing doesn't happen. And then I'm like wait Sarah, try again. But I think it's a good thing to do, and I started doing that recently.
KAYLA: I think that's a good thing to do.
SARAH: I would recommend it. Anyway, our poll is what are you thankful for? Are we going to do beef of the week? I feel like that's just such a downer after all this gratefulness.
KAYLA: I have one that's like kind of – It could be uplifting.
SARAH: Okay, hit me with it.
KAYLA: My beef of the week is me. And I'll tell you why.
SARAH: Because she's a meat.
KAYLA: Because I am a meat. I recently watched a movie for class. Really this is just me sharing some personal feelings, I guess.
SARAH: This is what beef of the week is. Come on.
KAYLA: That's true. So I was watching this movie for class and it quoted a play and it was this quote that hit me really hard. The quote is, "What on earth can you do on this earth, but catch at whatever comes near you with both of your hands until your fingers are broken?"
SARAH: That made my wrist hurt thinking about it.
KAYLA: Okay. You're ruining my moment. That quote just hit me really hard for some reason, because I feel like a lot of times you just kind of let things float by you, even though things are really good when you could just go all in, and even if it's risky you just go for it.
And so my beef of the week is me because I don't do that. And that quote hit me so hard, and I haven't stopped thinking about it since I watched that. And it's just I feel like a lot of conflict in my life right now is wanting to go for things very hard, at the same time as being afraid to do that. And that's why my beef of the week is me, because sometimes you should just go for it.
SARAH: Yeah. Did I tell you about how – I didn't tell you this. About how I think I decided what I'm going to put on my graduation cap? I started thinking about this months ago, because I know I wanted to put some sort of quote. I'm very into the quotes. And I was like, do I want to do it from like a musical or like a something. Because I have a quotes tag on my Tumblr. And I decided I want to do the Carrie Fisher quote that is “Stay afraid but do it anyway”. I like that. It's very applicable, I think.
KAYLA: I think so too.
SARAH: For when I graduate.
KAYLA: That's a very good quote.
SARAH: It is a good quote. I think that's going to be what I put on my graduation cap.
I'm not going to do beef of the week because I have a lot of beef this week, because my life is a trash fire as I mentioned. I used to hate the word trash, and now I kind of use it a lot. I used to exclusively use the word garbage. Anyway my life's a dumpster fire. That's my beef of the week. I'm not going to expand on that because I'll just get mad, and we just spent so much time being uplifting.
KAYLA: I know. It took us a while to get there.
SARAH: Yeah. We got there.
KAYLA: Yeah. We really did.
SARAH: Cheese, uplifting. Whatever.
You can find that poll and share us – (laughs) You can find that poll or you can share with us your beef of the week, or just your thankfulness of the week, on our Twitter @soundsfakepod, we also have a Tumblr, soundsfakepod.tumblr.com. You can also email us, soundsfakepod@gmail.com.
Or you can give us some money on Patreon, if you want to go above and beyond. What the fuck, thank you. Our Patreon is at patreon.com/soundsfakepoll, our lovely, lovely patrons –
KAYLA: It’s not.
SARAH: Soundsfakepoll?
BOTH: (laugh)
SARAH: I told you, trash fire.
KAYLA: Trash fire.
SARAH: I think I’m not that tired, and then I say things –
KAYLA: You really are.
SARAH: Anyway, patreon.com/soundsfakepod. Our $2 patrons, our lovely, lovely $2 patrons who throw their money at us constantly, are Sara Jones and Keith McBlaine, in the membrane, McBlaine in the brain.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Our $5 patrons are Jennifer Smart who’s been around forever, we love you Jennifer. Asritha Vinnakota, Austin Le, Drew Finney and Perry Fiero. For clarification, we love all of you.
And our $10 patron, who actually gives us $12 a month –
KAYLA: And is our original patron, I do think.
SARAH: Number one. We were like, we want to make $11 a month, and Emma was like, I will give you $11 a month.
KAYLA: Which was, yeah.
SARAH: Ooh, we lost our minds.
KAYLA: (laughs) We really did.
SARAH: But Emma, you can find her on YouTube by looking up Emma T Fink. We love all of our patrons, we love all of our listeners, thank you. Also, new listeners? Hey, what’s up, hello. Sorry about this whiplash of an episode.
KAYLA: Truly, I feel like what a journey we’ve been on.
SARAH: Hopefully I’ll be more alive and awake next week.
KAYLA: That’s the dream.
SARAH: Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday after Thanksgiving for more of us in your ears.
KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your turkeys.
SARAH: Oh. And then eat them
KAYLA: (laughs) Okay, bye.